Nerd fan fic something or other

To let you in to a little bit of my life, I play World of Warcraft. I am a nerd. If you want a little bit more, the servers are down for maintenance this morning, and so I was prowling around the forums because I wanted to play and couldn't. And I found a little writing challenge for writing a Vignette, a short moment in time, 500 words or less, obviously WoW themed.

So I wrote a moment and then had to slash it mercilessly to get it under the word limit. I was 840 originally.

And since I like it, I'm going to share it with you. Don't feel obligated to read it. Good chance it won't make sense if you don't play WoW.

~~~

Quaint round clay buildings squatted together in circles around a central clearing with a firepit, like companions camping together, under a brilliant sky, blue and thick enough to hide what was outside. The grass was bright green, fur over the rolling body of the land, with unfamiliar curving trees easing their way out of the ground. Pieces of earth floated above, separate from the land, but adding their features like a crown to Nagrand.

This was my ancestral home.

Chesra looked around, trying to make the words fit. Trying to summon some feeling of belonging to the little village.

A head popped out from one of the buildings, followed by a fleshy body that had to stoop to get through a door designed for something much smaller. A feral growl escaped the uneven teeth in the pinkish face when its single eye caught sight of her.

Chesra hefted her axe. It whistled as it cleaved the air. The ogre gurgled as it slumped.

"Ho... home..." Chesra tried. It still didn't make sense. She scratched the shaved part of her scalp, letting her hand creep up and tug at her mohawk. She caught herself, and used her other hand to pull it down, leading to an inspection of her nails, then palms.

"You get out!" a voice bellowed. Her right palm was briefly occupied. A flash of scorn crossed her brain for the pinkish skin of the ogres. Her light green was much more pleasing.

Green. It followed the lines of her palms, burrowed under the edges of the nails, and stained the backs of her hands, going under her armor up her arms and there to coat the rest of her body.

Green.

And there was the difference, the barrier. Green was all she had seen in Durotar, and fighting all she knew as she cut out her survival from the heat and the dryness and the scorpions and whatever else tried to kill her. It had not been her home. Her people had come from somewhere else, Draenor, before the desert and the humans and the demons and the green.

She had seen them, the other orcs, the ones who had not touched the demon blood, not been exiled. Their skin was brown, as natural as the earth, untainted.

Her feet crunched over the dirt around the firepit. Her eyes, a rare blue color, darted among the shadows and the doorways, looking for a piece of the past, of her past. Her fangs worried her lip and she felt something rising in her, a feeling familiar as heat. Her heart started to pound in her ears and the world became sharper, more real, swelling in her senses as her steps quickened. The feeling reached her throat and she crowed, a mix of a growl and a roar and a taunt.

Ogres burst into her vision and her axe sang, every time it met their bloated bodies, parting the skin, releasing the blood, Chesra felt something in her rejoice, drinking in the violence until the bodies piled up and nothing else moved to challenge her.

She was here alone, which suited a warrior like her just fine. She had been brought up to fight alone and it had challenged her to keep herself alive long enough that survival had become her ability. She didn't mind being alone, but it nagged at her now. She was alone because they couldn't fight.

The town washed out in her eyes, the houses once owned by the brown-skinned orcs taking on a soft hue, clay just short of melting from too much water. Her hand gripped her axe handle until it hurt. How could this be home? Orcs raised in Durotar became strong and fighters. They had to fight because the harsh lands were not where they came from, and if the humans had their way, were not where they would stay. But all orcs who made it to adulthood were like the land: spiky, dry, and hard. The brown-skinned orcs brought up in this land were soft, soft like the sky and the grass. They had no blood rage in them.

She realized she had been pulling at her forelock again and used her left hand to bat her right hand away. She distracted it by hoisting her axe over her shoulder and heading back toward the brown-orc town of Garadar, affecting an easy, rolling walk. All confidence, not hiding, for she was sure she could take anything that might leap out at her.

Because she was an orc. A real orc, skin scarred green by their mistakes, hard from the deserts in Azeroth and the fight with the humans, blood surging with rage that kept them alive and made them strong. Because this wasn't their home, just a mark on their past, a blip on her timeline that she would eventually leave behind her.

The edges of her lips curved in a smile around her jutting sharp teeth from her lower jaw. She was an orc. And the world could BRING IT.

Free Thing: Something I guess you can't do in Ames

Prior to last Tuesday (04/08), I was totally planning on going to this and then SOME IDIOTS decided to ruin it for all of us.

I am of course talking about VEISHEA.

VEISHEA is a big Iowa State University part, originally designed to showcase the college and be fun for everyone. It is preceded by Greek Week which is full of fund-raiser competitions between the Greek houses.

The week of VEISHEA typically has tons of events and shows running all week such as cookouts, crafts, art marts, plays, competitions, etc. culminating on Saturday with a parade featuring local and campus organizations, booths all over campus, fair foods like cheese curds and funnel cake and cherry pie, a big concert, campaniling, and in the past, fireworks at midnight.

Unfortunately, this event being a college event, you get a lot of students coming in from out of town, drinking, and getting stupid along with the students from in town. VEISHEA is a huge party week. Being a good legalistic under-21, I did not drink during VEISHEA while there, and so hunted down the events I was interested in.

The parade is the best parade in Ames and you can get tons of free stuff, and all the booths give free stuff as well, along with a fun look into a variety of college organizations and you get to find awesome things like slingshot super monkeys and tiny venus fly traps in a sealed jar (which I proceeded to kill because I have a black thumb). The fireworks were awesome. There was the mid-campus run. And I love cheese curds. I had planned to go to the parade this year and probably get sunburnt again (you should see my ISU ID picture... it was shortly after a VEISHEA parade). And most of that stuff is free. The big concert cost money, but good luck NOT hearing that if you are anywhere on campus. The food costs money. But you don't have to buy that stuff.

However, in the past, there was a big riot where people set stuff on fire on the streets and VEISHEA got cancelled for a while. It was just coming back when I got to college, with the stipulation that if there was another riot, it was over for good. The police were present and they would check any bags coming on to campus. They were actually fun, running campaigns that gave out t-shirts and hats to the students, making people aware of their presence and that they just wanted to have a safe, fun VEISHEA just as much as anyone. We understood.

I guess too many years has past and people don't remember that anymore. I even have some Iowa State Alumni friends who were practically rejoicing about the riots and it getting cancelled. "I don't know," one said, when questioned. "It shows the students VEISHEA isn't invincible."

I found that highly unnecessary. But even so, a bunch of students rioted this year, on a Tuesday of all things. They knocked down light poles, flipped cars, and were complete idiots.

And VEISHEA got cancelled. Go figure. And at this point, we don't know if it is coming back. Some people disagree with the decision. I only disagree with it in as far as I am unhappy it happened. I understand it.

Depending on the news source you read, you can hear about the students with the heart of VEISHEA holding their own events to make up for it, and that cancelling VEISHEA is a bad idea, and that it hurts Ames businesses, or you can talk to people with the police who are still dealing with troublemakers even later in the week and if you drive through Ames on a nice day like Saturday turned out to be (would have been a great day for a parade), you can see people sitting on lawns in front of a bunch of houses, drinking before noon.

I really just upset I missed the parade. It has rained in previous years. This year it was 80 degrees and sunny.

Free Thing: Eco Fair

There are maybe three parts of Ames. Three categories for the population.

The first are the casuals. People like me who only really know the surface of Ames. I know where Wal-Mart is, the Iowa State Conference Center, and a lot of grocery stores and restaurants. We have Sam's Club and Best Buy and Perfect Games.

Then, there are the students. The students pretty much have their own parts of Ames that they use, such as student housing areas like down on Coconino and the Grove, and then Welch Avenue, the Greek houses, campus, and a large amount of Lincoln Way. There's obviously some overlap with the casusals as students will go to Wal-Mart and so on, but I think a large amount of the casuals won't use some of the more student specific stuff, like going to gigs at the M-Shop, eating at the Student Union (parking), and probably won't be in the know for a lot of the student events. After I got out of college, I stopped keeping track of the various talks, games, celebrations, classes, and other things that cater to students and happen on or around campus. Student Ames can be more in depth that casual Ames, but is still far separate from what I consider to be Ames proper, the part of Ames that exists when the students all leave for the summer.

Townies/locals are the third catagory. Under the surface, Ames has a strong Buy Local, Main Street, organic/hippie population. This is Ames for the involved. The Main Street committee likes promoting local things and will do summer events like art walks, bands at the half-shell, farmer's market, and so on. This is the part of Ames that has the city government (which sometimes overlaps onto the student part) and establishes things like the aquatic center. There's the whole Main Street area which includes Main Street itself, but I stretch to involve the city government, post office, old library building, and so on. Main Street of course has charming little shops and awesome hole-in-the-wall places like Downtown Deli, my favorite sandwich shop in town. Better than Jimmy Johns or Subway in my opinion. And when you start delving into one of those, you find the Buy Local people, like spidery lines between many of the small businesses. Go in to get a sandwich from Downtown Deli and you'll see flyers for other services in Ames, bands at some local bars, and other events. Ask them where you can get a watch fixed and they can direct you. And related to them are the hippie/organic people, the ones who are targeted with events like the Eco Fair, who shop at the Farmer's Market and Wheatsfield co-op, the ones who seem to know what's going on locally and ride their bikes around to get to it.

And so, I want to delve into the deeper part of Ames this summer. And I already missed my first event.

Last year I went to the Eco Fair. Because I have hippie aspirations (which probably means I'll never be a real hippie if I have to aspire to it) and because it's FREE.

I biked there to lend me a little hippie cred and it was a whole bunch of booths in the back of City Hall representing local environment-related things. Like people willing to lend you goats to trim your back yard, Ames energy producers, and people who like LED lightbulbs.

The City of Ames has a section on their website for this event. It says

The City of Ames is excited to once again hold the annual Eco Fair. From 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. on Saturday, March 30, the Community Center Gymnasium, 515 Clark Ave., will be filled with educational booths and vendors. Ames residents can find the answers to energy-efficiency, conservation and sustainability questions.

The Eco Fair featrues City displays, community organizations, and vendors who offer energy-efficient products, programs or services. In addition to showcasing electric conservation, Eco Fair has expanded to include water conservation and watershed protection, landscaping, and transportation efficiency. Get useful information on products and services from vendors, see interesting displays, register for door prizes, play games, and join us for free food.

And so, I should have gone. Because swag.

(Notice: Swag means free stuff you get a trade shows, like lanyards and pens with logos. It does not mean bling and stuff rappers talk about)

Things to do in Ames for free?

Well?

No, that's not rhetorical. And it's not something I can answer. I'm asking you. What can you do in Ames for free?

See, I rather lost my job recently. I'm only mentioning that because it will explain why I suddenly need something to fill my free time. As soon as it gets summer out. Or 50 degrees, whatever works.

Did you know I am cursed when it comes to jobs? I considered myself smart, competent, and hard working. Past tense, I had a bad experience. But I always have a bad experience. Granted many of my jobs have been entry level, but it seems those are usually coupled with overbearing bosses, crazy bosses, micromanaging bosses, unethical bosses, and so on. And usually, all the other coworkers hate them too, so I don't think it's just me...

This wasn't about my boss this time, but the point is I'm cursed. So I'm taking it slow this time. People, when trying to encourage me, say there are lots of jobs out there, I'll find one soon... I thought I had a good one this time, so I don't want to go rushing in. We're fine.

But, what am I going to do? Last week, I did spring cleaning. Eventually, maybe I could do more cleaning, more in-depth cleaning, I don't know. But there is only so much cleaning one can do on one's own house.

I'm on the dreaded Allowance, so I can't exactly go about picking up a hobby, learning an instrument (from an instructor), planting a garden that the rabbits won't eat, etc, as I can't afford that stuff.

So, for today, I guess my free thing is the Library. Located in the convenient lot right next to Hobby Lobby, Pizza Hut, and HyVee, the library is nice and free. I've got a movie on hold right now, so I'll probably bike down there and get it and watch it for the afternoon. They also have a lot of books. I should get my butt into gear as far as reading goes.

Myself

Accepted in spite of my oddities
Failed in spite of my strengths
Forgiven in spite of my sins

Cautious to protect my Self
But when Self is destroyed
What am I scared of?

Was my Self ever whole in the first place?

And what will I do with the pieces?

"If you could just get me out of this one, I promise not to run off again!"

I've been having a rough time lately, and haven't really wanted to blog about it. And since I am unable to NOT think about things that stress me out, I really haven't been able to blog about anything else.

Kind of like when I go to donate plasma and my pulse is too high. So they have me sit for like five to ten minutes for it to go back down, but guess what? It goes UP. Because all I can do is think about my pulse being to high and I try to concentrate on relaxing, which makes me incapable of relaxing. Only time recently I was able to get it down enough to donate was when I was reading the last book of the Wheel of Time series which was probably sufficiently distracting to take my mind off of my pulse.

If I'm ever unemployed again, I rather doubt I'll be able to make money on Biolife. Shame.

But, as always, having a bad time gives me more chance for reflection than not. So what did I learn today? I might actually be able to live a "quiet life."

My rough time has involved some drama, so mentally push back by wanting the opposite of whatever it is that makes life difficult. Also, I get in one of those repentant moods so often characterized in children's books and stories and comics, the "God, if you just get rid of whatever is bothering me, I'll do all my chores without complaining forever!" If I get out of this, maybe I could resign myself to a quiet life.

I sing that bit from Beauty and the Beast that goes, "There must be more than this provincial life... I want adventure in the great wide somewhere. I want it more than I can say. And for once it might be grand to have someone understand I want so much more than they've got planned." I've felt like that all my life.

But if I can get back to a point where I am happy... or at least not stressed... I can think about the good things about that. Say it's in Ames. My parents are still here and I could see them. Mom will have potentially more time and we could spend it together. I'll be able to bike. Maybe as the years go by, I could get into a groove of going on RAGBRAI every year. I could garden in the backyard. Write (I know, far fetched). Go to local events, like Ames in the Halfshell, Parks and Recreation classes. Join a fitness place. Get a pool pass. I still don't know what I'd do in the winter. Get my own snowboard and a season's pass at Seven Oaks? Have a child, raise a family? Actually sew those curtains?

Could I live like that, quietly? David is convinced we're meant for something greater and this is just setting the stage, but who knows what that will entail?

Oh God, I want out so bad it scares me. Please give me strength to go on!

I dream of a summer forest...

I believe I've spoken about this before, but for a practical person, I am extremely susceptible to dreams, fancies, and ideas. Somebody mentions ONE THING and all of a sudden I have my whole life planned out as a pilot, a writer, an ecologist, whatever.

I think I wrote about it semi-recently along the lines that if I get a job, I can see the next 20 years or whatever at that job. It's really a rather depressing way to look at things like jobs.

So, my most recent flight of fancy which is probably entirely not an option and I wouldn't like it anyway because the word research makes me cringe up inside... ecology/forestry.

Granted it was Mom's idea originally. The Story County Conservation group would take her school kids out to tramp around the woods and point out interesting things and basically do those fun things that get kids interested in nature until other less-fun classes beat it out of them. I'm looking at you, Biology 212. But anyway, she mentioned that it would be a great job for me because I love tramping around in woods and picking up rocks to see what lives under them and I liked science back when science was fun.

I looked into it and realized I would need another degree and dismissed it.

So there are two things that made me dream again. One is a friend of ours named Shane. Shane currently sells cell phones at Target, but he just finished getting a degree in something like IT and will be getting a job working with computers, which he likes. And why not go back to school or do school part time if it leads to what you want to do?

And the second was an actual dream where basically, my grandparents were selling us their home in Kansas and David was actually accepting because it was a really good deal and David is an opportunistic buying and we were going to relocate to Kansas and I would have to quit my job, but there were rolling hills covered in trees that still had beautiful leaves even though it was winter that I could tramp through to my heart's delight... I should note that the house, outbuildings, and Kansas as shown in my dream look nothing like the actual house, outbuildings, or Kansas. I mean, rolling hills? For some reason I was freaking out in the dream because I didn't want to live in Kansas and when I woke up, I'm like, "What is wrong with me? Rolling hills with trees!"

And then I moped around a bit because I wanted a forest that wasn't freezing. Seriously, it's so cold around here I could cry... and then my tears would freeze.

And so then I'm like, "Hey, if I really wanted to be an ecologist, maybe I could go back to school part time and in a few years, I could get a job with Story County Conservation and tramp around in the woods!"

Which, I am sure that it doesn't work like that. I bet there isn't as much wood-tramping as I envision. And I would have to work more in the summer, which is precisely what I don't want to do... because I like being outside in nature in the summer... maybe that part would work out. And maybe (I haven't quite figured it out yet), I would need a graduate degree and if there is one thing that scares me more than research itself, it's dissertations. I wouldn't get a graduate degree in cookies or biking or World of Warcraft if I had to write a dissertation.

Queue David coming in and saying, "You should be a writer! It would be perfect for you!"

Oh well. Maybe this dream can't happen, just like the airplane pilot dream. Or puppy dream. Or living in Colorado dream. But it might amuse me for a little bit. And let me think of warm summer woods. And I can add "ecologist dream" to the list of dreams that didn't work out next time I need to trot out the proof of my own unreasonable whimsical emotions.

I bet Mom saw this coming.