Musings of a bored employee

I feel like I've really only just begun life in general. I had to deal with school for the past seventeen or so years and thought that once I got out, I would be meeting life! The fulfillment of dreams! The start of adventure! The culmination of all the learning I did in childhood!

Ok, nowhere near that optimistic. Actually I've had a Peter Pan mentality pretty much since I was born. If he showed up and offered to take me to Neverland, I'm not even sure I would've had second thoughts. I NEVER wanted to grow up. It seemed like growing up always came with more responsibilities and less freedom and fun.

By the end of college, I was bored with college and ready to do something else, but I can't say my heart leaped at the idea of nine-to-fiving it at a desk job. The economy made sure I didn't have to worry about that and around six months after I graduated, I finally managed to get A job at Panera Bread.

Now when I was working hard in college and listening to idealistic professor talk about all the great things we would be doing in journalism, I wasn't exactly pumped to go into news. I wanted to do magazine with a more creative and fun aspect. And I actually read magazines, unlike newspapers, so that's a good sign right there. I was still worried about going into magazines, but even so, I didn't really want to go into sandwich-making and cashiering.

Which is where I am now. The culmination of my 17 years of schooling and thousands of dollars of tuition and I can now take your order and even, possibly, make it for you. Unless it includes a salad; I don't do salads.

Now I've mostly been able to repress my "I'm failing my own potential and expectations and everyone else's as well" because I'm doing this to get David through college and mostly I just stamp those instincts down. Shut up already, at least it's a job.

David graduates in December and we will probably move to Des Moines, which all of a sudden means that 1) We don't have to rely entirely on my income, 2)I will have to switch jobs anyway, and 3) there could actually be places where I could "use my degree" in Des Moines.

Now with the hope of actually being able to work at a place that is not Panera (and hopefully a step up from it... as in not Burger King either) is making me want to do something else. I am not fitted out for a career, I would get bored. If it were up to me, I'd probably switch jobs every year until I could find a job I wanted to stick with... for maybe three years.

All this to say, I am becoming discontent. I want to do something else. There's got to be more to life that just work.