Having had a difficult time with starting babywearing and everyone seeming to have their own experience, I figured I'd relate mine. You know, for posterity.
Crap, I'm going to be a mommy blogger, aren't I?
*sigh* Think I could market a blog that partly talks about my baby and partly talks about my libertarian political opinions? No?
Anyway, I was planning on babywearing long before Genevieve was born. I have leanings toward being a "crunchy mama," that is very natural, organic, attachment parenting, etc. Not full on, just leanings. For example, I never wanted to co-sleep (although I was willing to recognize the extent I would go just to get some sleep) and Genevieve is not a cuddly baby, so all good. No co-sleeping here. But my mother had made a ring sling for her second child, my younger brother, and proceeded to wear all her subsequent babies and loved it. I'd heard a lot of good things about babywearing. My mother also made me a sling.
When Genevieve was first born, I was scared to do anything with that tiny little scrunchy baby. I had Mom wear her first, then show me. By the time Genevieve was four or five weeks, I thought that thing was magic. She didn't have colic, but she was a fussy newborn. She could be crying and I'd pop her in the sling and start walking and within minutes she'd pass out. I went on so many walks and my body wasn't healed yet... yeah.
Enter week six. It's like right after the first
Wonder Week. Genevieve suddenly discovers there is a world outside of the sling. She would plant her hands on my chest and push her head all the way backward, looking at the world upside-down. Instead of sleeping, she'd start fussing within fifteen minutes. I went to a babywearing group. "No, you're doing it right. It's not you, it's her."
My babywearing dreams were shattered. I started using the stroller since she liked the movement and would eventually fall asleep in that. I would get mad at articles like "
How Babywearing Literally Saved My Life."
She could go hiking and eat at an oyster bar and have her life back and I would struggle to get the stroller up the step into the tea shop. Other moms going to some of the nursing support groups I went to would be babywearing and I would be taking up half the space with my giant stroller. I was reduced to dreaming, "maybe the next baby would let me wear him..."
I picked up a babywearing book through interlibrary loan. Aside from feeling bad since the first several chapters were on how awesome and natural babywearing was (her baby just snuggled down and went to sleep!), there was one helpful note: "Wear your baby in the position she likes to be carried."
Genevieve insisted on being carried facing out. She would fuss if she was turned in toward shoulder or chest or cradled. But the quickest way to calm her down was to face her out, and then apply bouncing, or bouncing to Irish music as needed. But babies don't have much head control and you weren't supposed to face them out until 3-4+ months. There's also some "controversy" where people argue that forward facing can cause hip dysplasia and overstimulation, although generally people now agree that it doesn't cause hip dysplasia (although might not be good if your baby already has it) and you can turn your baby toward you in the event of overstimulation.
So I waited until then and revisited my local babywearing group that had a lending library of many different types of carriers.
This time I walked out with an
Infantino Wrap & Tie Mei Tai-style carrier that had a forward-facing option. It's discontinued, but you can still pick it up on Ebay. I loved this carrier so much that I went and purchased one before I had to return the lending library one at the end of a month. Genevieve would sit in it for long periods of time (usually until she got tired and needed a nap), happily looking around, kicking her legs, and smiling at people who would talk to her. She became my companion on trips to the library or grocery store and it seemed like the world opened up. When she would start to get fussy at the end of a wake period, I would strap her on and go on a walk and she would calm down and enjoy the scenery.
Through the lending library, I was able to try several different carriers and finally decided my favorite was the
Beco Gemini. It was comfortable and easy. I put it on my Christmas list.
Meanwhile, Genevieve got older. She learned she could turn her head, she learned how to track moving objects, she learned that things existed beyond her range of vision and how to find them. Gradually, I was able to carry her on my hip. She still wasn't very elegant in front-face-in and would keep trying to look around, but she didn't cry. I could carry her how I wanted. I tend to fall prey to the idea that Genevieve won't change, she will always be fussy or needing constant entertainment or bad at napping or having to be worn face-forward. Babies aren't like that. Babies change.
I got the Beco Gemini for Christmas and broke it in trail-walking with Genevieve on my back. I wore her to the library facing out in a little warm bear suit. She got sick and I carried her around facing in since all she wanted was to be held.
She still has a hard time napping in it. Some babies just pass out or sit contentedly. Genevieve has to be able to see what's going on. She has to be really super tired to fall asleep, and then she doesn't sleep for long. But she's fallen asleep in the ring sling and once on David's back as he was moving his sister, which was pretty cute.
So, all in all, my baby who hated being in the ring sling became a babywearing baby after all. And I love wearing her around.
