Have I complained about post offices before? Maybe. I find them seriously confusing, having not grown up around them.
So I need to pick up a package. I go in and see four desk/window opening things and a long line of people holding boxes. I exam the signs. U.S. Shipping. International Shipping. Upgrade Services. Information/Bulk Mailings/Claims & Inquiries. And in case you forget, all desks are labeled "All items must be properly packaged & addressed when presented @ the window."
Well, I am not shipping. I don't care about shipping.
So I wade over to Information. I suppose I should have suspected I wasn't supposed to do that because of several displays in my pathway. But I don't necessarily attribute poor interior design to a purposeful plan to keep people out. So I stand behind a woman heaping praises on the post office service... I wonder how often one has to go to the post office to get such a high opinion of them. Maybe she sells things on Etsy? Maybe she doesn't have an email account? Maybe she's lived in Ames for 46 years? Actually, that one is true.
Anyway, after the woman leaves, the employee looks at me like I'm a dirty hobo tracking mud in and asks, "were you next in line?"
"No, I just want to know where to pick up a package. All the signs are for shipping."
"Well, the best way is just to stay in line." Trespasser, her voice seemed to say.
Well, I wasn't ever in line, but whatever. I go to the end. The lady who had been in front of me tells me that I should stand in line, in a very friendly way, and sometimes someone will come up from the back and ask if anybody is just picking anything up.
"Are you from Ames?" she asks cheerfully. Ugh, not that question. Probably brought on by my clear cluelessness when it comes to post offices.
"My parents are from Iowa," I hedge, ending up revealing my family origins before she bids me good luck and goes on her way.
A man drags a display of holiday packaging material in front of a door. Another interior design error, this one probably meaning they're closed.
How am I supposed to know how this place functions? Are normal American school kids given a class in package shipping? A lesson on how to navigate an archaic place with misleading signage? I suppose it could be that part of the class where they write letters to someone and if they're lucky, that someone is a video game manufacturer who is charmed by the letter and sends the kid free limited edition stuff...
In the end, my little slip that proclaimed my package was "(check mark) At the Post Office" was lying and my package is still in a truck somewhere. The guy was nice, but still told me that like I should have known it. And to be honest, I did wonder about that detail, but I don't know how late those guys stay out.
How was I supposed to know? And when will they invent teleportation so I can ship things straight from the internet?
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