Her name is Luna. She looks cute, doesn't she? And all I can do is worry. Right now, I worry about her chewing on the wrong things and where she's going to stay for Christmas, or if I'll have to spend my Christmas babysitting her. When she explores and tries to play, I worry about what she'll find. When she sleeps, I worry about her being awake and hyper when I need her to sleep later. And not to mention housetraining. I know, I'm a party pooper.
And as she ages, I will worry her shedding, about her getting away, about training her, about her destroying things out of boredom. And what I'll do with her when I have to go somewhere, or what we'll do with her while we're on trips? We've had her for two days, and I'm about to give myself an ulcer. I've also worked myself into a state where my emotions are on a bigger roller coaster than I can remember. I can be happy and then crying just like that.
David has thought about it for a while, but for me, it went from a conversation in which I thought we'd ruled puppies out to David coming home for lunch and calling the owner to the next day picking her up. I was brought into the discussion and then because of my pre-puppy worry, taken out of the discussion. I couldn't decide, so it was decided for me.
David thinks it will be a good thing. Caring for an animal will help make us less selfish, less living just for us... but I've got to admit, I rather liked living for myself. And maybe this will help us graduate toward kids.
A friend pointed out that it seemed weird to get a dog I don't want to get me to get kids I don't want.
I do trust David on this. However, I don't really trust myself. And I've cried twice in writing this. Really, I am crying just thinking about crying these days. And that awful school shooting makes me cry pretty much every time I think about it.
But it isn't all bad, really. I've just never had a puppy. She's only had four accidents (which might seem like a lot for two days, but we've been taking her out every one to two hours, so that is a LOT of overall... pottying). She's really good with meeting other dogs and people. She'll get hyper and like to chew, but after a short bit she usually calms down and eventually just chills or naps. She doesn't whine all night, just a little bit in the beginning. So she seems pretty good, for a puppy. I'm sure there are worse puppies. David rubs my back and tells me it will be okay and I try to believe him.
I'm kind of pathetic.
No comments:
Post a Comment